I’m going to reveal a bit of my weirdness here. Ok, more than a little… I recently purchased a pack of beautiful, jewel-bright Sharpies. I’m not an arty person but I was so excited when they arrived!
I’ve promised myself that I’m not going to wear another plain bag again, they shall all be decorated.
Yep, those bags which stick to my tummy and catch the poop as it falls out of my stoma (her name is Rosie). You’re probably thinking: ‘why would anyone want to decorate THAT?!’
Well, it cheers me up a little bit. It’s fun. I like colour. The original bag colours are so BORING, a pale beige. I even suggested to one company that they should come in different designs. I can hope, right? The world needs more colour.
My next goal is to get some stickers and glitter (why not go all the way?!)
Now for the disaster bit… Last night as I was trying (and failing) to sleep, I became convinced that I could smell my bag. Or rather… The contents. Let me explain a bit. Unless something is going wrong, there’s no smell at all. Nothing. Zilch. Nada. I don’t walk around smelling of poo. The contents, however, do have a smell (obviously!) Not very pleasant.
Now this has happened before. There have been occasions where I’ve been convinced that my bag is leaking and I even changed it up to three times a day for a week, only to realise afterwards that it was my mind playing tricks on me. And er… People aren’t usually happy to oblige when I say ‘smell my stomach!! Can you smell anything?!’ I wonder why? I know I can be a bit aggressive when I suspect a leak… Oops.
So I smelt a whiffy scent coming from my bag. Looked down and sure enough, it was starting to leak from the bottom. Eeeek! Thankfully it had only got my trousers, my bed sheets were still safe.
I opened my drawer, which I keep well stocked with supplies, took out a new bag and… Horror! It was plain! Time for drastic action! I grabbed my Sharpies and scribbled out a quick design – ta-da!!
Sorry, the lighting is pretty awful. I need to get a stronger bulb for my room.
I’m extremely lucky it wasn’t a full-blown leak alhamdulillah. I’ve told myself a hundred times that I’m prepared for it (waterproof mattress protector, clean nightie and sheets within easy reach, spare mattress if need be!) but I don’t know how I’ll actually cope if the time ever comes. I hope it never does.
As the bathroom is across the hall from me, I went to change the bag and had an idea. There’s no way I’d be sleeping soon – I HATE middle of the night bag changes! – so I might as well have a lovely long bath. Have you ever tried searching for bubble bath at 4AM? The thing was eluding me. Eventually I decided to use shower gel as bubble bath. Desperate times and all that.. It worked! The bubbles were AMAZING.
So armed with my new, bag I stepped into the luxurious foam… Bliss! It was probably a bit too luxurious but it felt wonderful!
I’m pleased to report that the new bag stayed stuck to me. And my lovely designs didn’t smudge in the bath.
I like to put a fun little uplifting comment on there – many people still look at me with pity when they’re told that I have a bag. I don’t understand why, it’s pretty awesome and I’m VERY thankful. So of course, I have to remind myself that Rosie isn’t an inconvenience.
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